Top Ten Best… Everything!

Quite possibly the most creative radio ads ever created, the Budweiser Ads promoting “Real Men of Genius” are just that: genius. Although you only hear a select few over the airwaves, there are well over a hundred unique and hilarious ads. In fact, some of the most hilarious Real Men of Genius ads aren’t heard on the radio at all! Here’s a list of just 10 of the funniest Budweiser Ads (originally called Real American Heroes):

10.  Mr. Giant Foam Finger Maker

“They’re enormous, yes, but one size does fit all. Brilliant.”

9.  Mr. Bowling Shoe Giver Outer

“One wrong move and we’re on the fast train to Blisterville.”

8.  Mr. Athletic Groin Protector Inventor

“Here, stick this in your pants.”

7. Mr. Garden Gnome Maker

“What says, ‘Welcome to our home,’ like a dwarf in the hedge?”

6. Mr. 80 SPF Sunblock Wearer

“30 SPF? Please. You may as well be wearing cooking oil.”

5. Mr. Gangster Rapper Posse Member

“What do you do when you have no talent what-so-ever? Attach yourself to someone who does.”

4. Mr. T-Shirt Launcher Inventor

“Your high powered cotton cannon makes every section the nosebleed section.”

3. Mr. Pro Sports Heckler Guy

“Apparently those who can’t coach sit 30 rows back, shirtless, shouting obscenities.”

2. Mr.Edible Underwear Inventor

“Nothing says, ‘I want you,’ like a man with a mouth full of underpants.”

1. Mr. In the Car Nose Picker

“Why do you do it? ‘Cuz the windows are up and you think we can’t see you.”

Honorable mention goes to:

Mr. Nudest Colony Activities Coordinator

“Lawn darts? Out of the question.”

This is only the icing on the cake of those hilarious ads. Rest assured that I will have at least one more top ten list devoted to the Budweiser ads.

Finally, an update on the Tattoo Contest:

The entries are in, the page is locked, and I’m compiling entries to be sent to the judges. Check back on or before October 31st to see where your tattoo falls on our Top Ten Tattoos. Thank you to all who participated!

They’re out there, we’ve all heard them. Thanks to the internet, silly myths are quite easily passed around by the uber-gullible. Some of these myths are obviously fake, like Bubble Yum Gum being made of spider eggs, or Pop Rocks and soda creating a lethal combination. But other myths aren’t so obviously fake. So for your reading pleasure, here’s a list of the Top 10 Silliest Myths you’ll find anywhere… especially in your inbox.

10. “Beware” Email Forwards

These silly forwards include rapists luring women with $5 bills , murderers luring women out of their homes with the sound of a baby crying, robbers who spray women with perfume to steal their belongings, you get the drill. Have you received the email on how to defend yourself in an attack? You might be surprised that much of that forward is not very good information. Don’t believe me? Check it out here.

9. Urban Legends

Alright, people, keep it smart when you read your emails. There are no snakes in the ball pit at your favorite fast food restaurant. Your child will not be poisoned by their Halloween candy (although there could be razor blades or pins in there, apparently), and Dawn Dishwashing Liquid will not erode your tike’s corneas. Come on, now. Tell me you knew that already.

8. Pregnancy Myths

Some people must enjoy preying on the delicate emotions of pregnant women. Ladies, do not believe these silly myths, please. First of all, it is impossible to get pregnant by simply swimming in a pool (now, if you were doing other things in the pool, that’s another story…). Also, do not count on Coca Cola as an effective form of birth control. Now, if you’re already pregnant, don’t count on Drano to predict your baby’s sex, and rest assured that certain restaurants will not put you in labor.

7. Nostradamus Myths

The French astrologer, Nostradamus was, no doubt, ahead of his time. But, he did not predict 9/11, George W. Bush’s election, or the crash of the Columbia Space Shuttle. I wonder how this guy would feel, being associated with such negative events? (Awww, come on, it was set up perfectly for a Bush pun, I couldn’t resist.)

6. Cell Phone Myths

Try as you might, you will not be able to unlock your car by calling someone who has a key-less remote and aiming your cell phone toward your car. In addition, you will not be able to track your cell phone using a free website, nor will you be able to reach an emergency call center by dialing 112 , or #77. Sorry!

5. Food and Drink Myths

It makes sense that you want to be careful about what you put into your body. But these silly myths put fear and concern where there shouldn’t be. First of all, Mountain Dew will not affect the “family jewels” in any way, shape, or form. Second, the ingredients in Red Bull are not associated with brain tumors. Believe it or not, Twinkies will not last an eternity and mixing Pop Rocks and Soda will not kill you.

4. Disney Myths

These myths, though quite entertaining to read, are not true. Walt Disney’s facade is not one of the singing busts found in the graveyard at the Haunted Mansion in Disneyland and no one suffered a heart attack after the ride first opened. As far as Disney movies go, there is no penis illustrated on the cover of The Little Mermaid, and the priest is not sporting wood in the wedding scene between Eric and Ariel’s imposter (take a look for yourself, though, I’m not so convinced on either of these myths).

3.  Religion Myths

I hate to break it to you, but declaring “Jedi” as your religion will not actually make it a religion (but, may the Force be with you, anyway). Scientists have never discovered a lost day, and no one has ever drilled their way to Hell.

2. Sports Myths 

This is slightly sports and slightly movie-related, but Back to the Future II did not predict the 1997 World Series. Tom Brady was never a cast of The Brady Bunch, Superbowl Sunday does not create the most domestic violence in a single day every year,  and no one has ever been eaten by a crocodile while golfing (but Chubbs did lose his hand to one in Happy Gilmore).

1. Political Myths

It’s that time again, political mudslinging, debates, and the usual crazy political myths about the candidates. These myths take the number one spot on the Top 10 Silliest Myths for one simple example: Barack Obama is the anti-Christ . Come on now people, seriously? I don’t care who you’re voting for, this is completely insane. Another silly political myth is this picture of Sarah Palin in a flag bikini wielding a weapon. You gotta love Photoshop!

If you haven’t checked out YouTube’s collection of Movie Trailer Spoofs, you are missing out, my friend! Have you ever gone to see a movie after watching the trailer, only to realize after the movie is over that it was nothing like what you expected? Well, a bunch of talented folks have taken that concept one step further and created some of the most hilarious movie trailer recuts on YouTube. Just in case you don’t know what a trailer spoof is, allow me to explain. Ya know those movie previews you see before the movie starts? They usually have music and cuts to match the theme of the film, right? Well, with these spoofs, the creative individuals who have put them together have taken different music (for instance slasher movie soundtrack for a children’s movie) and cut the movie up to create a whole new trailer with an entirely different meaning. It’s amazing what an editing job and some new music can do to recreate how a movie appears!

Here are 10 of the best YouTube trailer spoofs, let me know which one you enjoy the most:

10. Cat In The Hat: Family/Comedy-turned-Horror

9. The Princess Bride: Comedy-turned-Horror/Drama

8. Dumb and Dumber: Comedy-turned-Horror

7. The Waterboy: Comedy-turned-Horror/Drama

6. School of Rock: Comedy/Family-turned-Horror

5. Liar Liar: Comedy-turned-Drama

4. Dodgeball: Comedy-turned-Drama

3. Mary Poppins: Family-turned-Horror

(For the record, this one really freaked me out!)

2. Superbad: Comedy-turned-Action/Drama

And finally, the best YouTube Trailer Spoof of all time…

1. The Shining: Horror-turned-Comedy/Family

Did I miss your favorite YouTube Trailer Spoof? Post it in a comment below!